then and now

i think its sad when i see these people
who always have someone theyre with
even right after the last one
and on and on again
i've been this way for so long
i dont think i'll ever stand next to someone
if theres an open space i can stand alone in
you will see me there
if only your eyesight was not as bad as the rest
because i am alive
but nobody says much to me
they tend to walk right by me

i am

i am a writer
i am a musician
music is the world and life
nothing more nor less
but words, are all i have
i write for no one but myself
i do not write sadness
i write feelings
i write truth
i am a man, and i dont think twice to tell my stories
my words will outlive me
and when they do
maybe someone will care then
maybe then, someone somewhere will understand
whats its like
because this world is so fucking beautiful
its just more enjoyable when your not in it alone

i love the sky and the trees
i love rain and city streets
i love people watching
i love watching the world go round
all while never even opening my mouth
there is something bigger than me and you
and all the beauty we see
whether we realize it or not
i dont know what this is
but i have the hope and faith in it
that it will save my life

no such thing as home #2

i ran like hell
into unknowns
mainly to feel a sense of home
"this cant be" i remember saying
and it wasnt
but neither was anywhere else
i was young and dumb
there was never, and will never be
there is no such thing as home

someone

all i want to know is
long after im dead and gone, will somebody see what i see right now?
will someone someday feel like i feel right now?
will somebody roam the same city streets and train tracks as me?
thinking what i thought?
will someone, somewhere, know my name?
i wrote this for someone who lives out there, not among us
but she could be inside one of you right now

red cup

i could hear the music from in the street
once i was in, i didnt know where to put my feet
shoulder to shoulder
flagstaff arizona
everyone had their red cup
for them, always filled up
drinking, dancing through that night
i too, had a red cup
but mine was the only one with nothing in it
"too crowded" i said to myself
as i wandered to the backyard
a gentlemen gave me a cigarette
i decided to light it up, to make me standing there less awkward
a girl came up to me telling me how i looked extremely familiar
but soon started talking with the guy next to me
i guess i didnt impress
im sure they had much more in common
all in all, id say a typical night

i need to start filling that red cup